OK. My problem is simply this: I hate people.
I know, this is the real world and I have to deal with them. But come on! Did everybody wake up and eat a big bowl of Stupid this morning??
Why are you in such a foul mood today? What has your undies in a knot?
Well, I am just so tired of stupid people! Isn’t that enough?
Key spark for today: I took my son (5 y/o) to a bank grand opening today. I had heard on the radio that Scooby-do was going to be there and he is (currently) my son’s “Big Thing”. It turned out to be a huge deal. There were all kinds of things for kids to do and free hotdogs and stuff. We were having a great time.
At this point, I should tell you that I am raising my son per the directives listed in this blog, but specifically the last 2 posts.
We are in line at the balloon animal maker guy when a – well, it’s not mean if it is accurate – toothless bitch decides she wants her kid to get a balloon animal, too. She is line two people behind me. I hear her swearing at her kid, yelling for her husband (or whatever) to “get the fuck” over there so that she can go sit down and being a general pain in the ass to everyone within earshot.
The people between her and I eventually leave the line (I don’t blame them as I do not want my son learning that type of language at 5, but I’m me and will not pander to lesser idiots), bringing her right behind me.
“I bet all these little fuckers are gonna get real big balloon animals,” she says – loudly and to no one in particular. At this, I turn and begin with politeness.
“Would you mind not swearing like that around my son, please?”
“It’s a free country, asshole. I have Free Speech in my Constitution!” (Nice reply, right?)
I swear I am not making this up. This is how it truly happened.
I turn back around to my son and try to keep his focus on me and not on her.
“Brent (the husband), will you get the fuck over here? I want to sit for a minute!”
Brent is in the next line getting an autograph from a former Dallas Cowboy. This means that Brent is NOT moving.
I turn again and say, “Ma’am, I asked you nicely and would like for you to show me a little respect by not using vulgar language in front of my son. If you cannot do that, I will see if there is someone that will help me make you stop.”
Not really a threat, but trying to show that there is a line and she is dancing real close to it.
“My husband will kick your ass if you keep talking to me like that.”
It’s now over. Brent, as I said, is in the next line. He is about 6 people away from getting what will surely be the centerpiece for his mantle for years to come. Behind him is a Dallas DART cop. Brent is the last in line.
“Excuse me, Officer. Will you please explain that this vulgar, abusive, and unnecessary language is not tolerated in public? I have asked twice now for her to stop, but she is just not understanding that she – and her language – is offensive!”
Cop, “Ma’am, if you do not refrain from using inappropriate language, I will have to ask you to leave.”
Bitch, “I got rights. I can say anything I want to. I came here with my family to have some fun and goddammit, I’m gonna!”
Cop, pulling out radio and saying something I couldn’t hear.
Next thing I know, there are 4 officers around her and her son, escorting her away. Brent passes me and gives me an attitude, saying something about it being MY fault he won’t get his coveted autograph.
“If you would teach your wife not to be a bitch, you would be getting that autograph right about now, Brent,” I say as he turns to follow his yelling, obscene bitch of a wife.
I just want everyone to play nicely for a while. Not get all bent out of shape if someone asks for a little consideration. I don’t. Why can’t anyone else do this?
Saturday, October 21, 2006
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Degrading Women part 2
The solution seems to be simple, at least to me.
Teach respect. This next part is where I might lose a lot of you folks reading this. Teach respect to BOTH little boys AND little girls. Let's address these individually, starting with the more obvious point of view:
Little boys.
Men, teach your little boys to be respectful to everyone they meet. I was witness to a common phenomenon just the other day.
Two people that considered one another a friend met and developed their friendship on line. They both had similar views and enjoyed the banter they had going between them. They were both heterosexual males that had wives that they loved, they were faithful to their respective families, they shared corresponding religious views and even kept the same secret from each other: each was mildly racist. Both felt no shame in that fact, but realized that there is a time and place to express those ideals.
They had talked for a couple of months on line and decided they would meet at a Starbucks to see each other face to face for the first time... to try and move the "on line" friendship to a "real" friendship. The day arrives and "Friend One" (a black man) and "Friend Two" (a white man) see each other for the first time. Both are angered with themselves because they have become friends with a member of a disliked race (as I said earlier, both are MILDLY racist). The friendship ends there. They just cannot get over that hurdle.
How does this relate to the respect point? Like this:
Both had been taught by their families that people of the other race were not worth their respect. When they did not know that the other was black or white, respect was given and a bond formed. Because of what they had been taught, the bond was broken. Both are now happy in their own lives and still send the occasional email, but the friendship is lost.
To bring it back around to the point, it is your responsibility, brother, fathers and step-fathers, to show the young boys each and every day how to be respectful to everyone, especially women. Women are different than men, and with those differences come certain feelings by some of superiority or inferiority. I don't personally agree with that, but I know some men feel like they are better than women. I know some men that feel like they are not worthy of women, as well.
An example: Men can only destroy life; Women can both destroy AND create it. We, as different sexes, are NOT equal. Neither is one above the other. We are simply very different. Man's strength compliments Woman's weakness, and visa-versa. We, as a species, cannot yet exist one without the other.
THEREFORE
Teach respect of girls/women to the young boys and they will grow up following that creed. Teach them to respect everyone until the individual loses it, and they may not miss out on a fulfilling friendship because of outdated and bigoted feelings passed down to each generation for no reason.
Little girls.
Teach them, sisters, mothers and step-mothers, to show self respect. Again, this is accomplished by example. If you dress like a street-walking hooker, then they are going to think that it is alright to show that much skin and dress like that. If you allow the men in your life to treat you a certain way (physically abusive or like a warm place to put their penises and nothing more), the little girls will grow up thinking that is all that they are to men - that it is normal to be hit and demeaned by the very people that are supposed to love you. Worse still, they might grow up thinking that the only way to show affection is through physical abuse. Then they search it out.
Teach them, brother, fathers and step-fathers, to DEMAND respect from the men they invite into their lives. My brother did something for his daughter and I want to do it for my daughter when she is old enough. He took her out on her first date. It happened like this:
He picked her up on time, dressed nicely in clean clothes and well groomed, and introduced himself to her parents. He opened her car door for her to get in and get out, held the door at the restaurant, and held her chair for her to sit. When she got up to go to the restroom, He stood as she did and sat after she was out of sight. He then stood when she returned, held her chair again, and only after she was settled did he sit. He spoke of subjects that interested them both in a very respectful tone and was a perfect gentleman.
They, then, went to pay mini-golf. He was attentive and polite. He never gloated over a victory or became angry at a loss. He did not ogle her at any time. He did not ogle any other women he saw while they were together. He did not push a kiss goodnight at the end of the evening.
Later, when my niece and her mother were talking, she said that she had a wonderful time and saw why her mother liked her father so much. Later still, when my brother sat down with my niece, he explained that she should expect nothing less that the behavior she received that night with him when she goes out on a date with a boy. If he does not demonstrate that type of behavior, he is not worth her time, and certainly not her affection.
She has excellent self-esteem and always conducts herself with dignity and grace... and every boyfriend she has had has been a gentleman. None have ever stooped to cat-calling, bragging or disrespectful behavior in regards to her. She learned that from BOTH parents.
I welcome any and all feedback.
Teach respect. This next part is where I might lose a lot of you folks reading this. Teach respect to BOTH little boys AND little girls. Let's address these individually, starting with the more obvious point of view:
Little boys.
Men, teach your little boys to be respectful to everyone they meet. I was witness to a common phenomenon just the other day.
Two people that considered one another a friend met and developed their friendship on line. They both had similar views and enjoyed the banter they had going between them. They were both heterosexual males that had wives that they loved, they were faithful to their respective families, they shared corresponding religious views and even kept the same secret from each other: each was mildly racist. Both felt no shame in that fact, but realized that there is a time and place to express those ideals.
They had talked for a couple of months on line and decided they would meet at a Starbucks to see each other face to face for the first time... to try and move the "on line" friendship to a "real" friendship. The day arrives and "Friend One" (a black man) and "Friend Two" (a white man) see each other for the first time. Both are angered with themselves because they have become friends with a member of a disliked race (as I said earlier, both are MILDLY racist). The friendship ends there. They just cannot get over that hurdle.
How does this relate to the respect point? Like this:
Both had been taught by their families that people of the other race were not worth their respect. When they did not know that the other was black or white, respect was given and a bond formed. Because of what they had been taught, the bond was broken. Both are now happy in their own lives and still send the occasional email, but the friendship is lost.
To bring it back around to the point, it is your responsibility, brother, fathers and step-fathers, to show the young boys each and every day how to be respectful to everyone, especially women. Women are different than men, and with those differences come certain feelings by some of superiority or inferiority. I don't personally agree with that, but I know some men feel like they are better than women. I know some men that feel like they are not worthy of women, as well.
An example: Men can only destroy life; Women can both destroy AND create it. We, as different sexes, are NOT equal. Neither is one above the other. We are simply very different. Man's strength compliments Woman's weakness, and visa-versa. We, as a species, cannot yet exist one without the other.
THEREFORE
Teach respect of girls/women to the young boys and they will grow up following that creed. Teach them to respect everyone until the individual loses it, and they may not miss out on a fulfilling friendship because of outdated and bigoted feelings passed down to each generation for no reason.
Little girls.
Teach them, sisters, mothers and step-mothers, to show self respect. Again, this is accomplished by example. If you dress like a street-walking hooker, then they are going to think that it is alright to show that much skin and dress like that. If you allow the men in your life to treat you a certain way (physically abusive or like a warm place to put their penises and nothing more), the little girls will grow up thinking that is all that they are to men - that it is normal to be hit and demeaned by the very people that are supposed to love you. Worse still, they might grow up thinking that the only way to show affection is through physical abuse. Then they search it out.
Teach them, brother, fathers and step-fathers, to DEMAND respect from the men they invite into their lives. My brother did something for his daughter and I want to do it for my daughter when she is old enough. He took her out on her first date. It happened like this:
He picked her up on time, dressed nicely in clean clothes and well groomed, and introduced himself to her parents. He opened her car door for her to get in and get out, held the door at the restaurant, and held her chair for her to sit. When she got up to go to the restroom, He stood as she did and sat after she was out of sight. He then stood when she returned, held her chair again, and only after she was settled did he sit. He spoke of subjects that interested them both in a very respectful tone and was a perfect gentleman.
They, then, went to pay mini-golf. He was attentive and polite. He never gloated over a victory or became angry at a loss. He did not ogle her at any time. He did not ogle any other women he saw while they were together. He did not push a kiss goodnight at the end of the evening.
Later, when my niece and her mother were talking, she said that she had a wonderful time and saw why her mother liked her father so much. Later still, when my brother sat down with my niece, he explained that she should expect nothing less that the behavior she received that night with him when she goes out on a date with a boy. If he does not demonstrate that type of behavior, he is not worth her time, and certainly not her affection.
She has excellent self-esteem and always conducts herself with dignity and grace... and every boyfriend she has had has been a gentleman. None have ever stooped to cat-calling, bragging or disrespectful behavior in regards to her. She learned that from BOTH parents.
I welcome any and all feedback.
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